...to this day
your words continue to linger my mind
when you told me
we don't belong together
when you told me
why can't you see that
I don't want to be with you
when you told me
what part of that
don't you understand
to hear those words
from someone I loved
felt like knives
sinking into me
then somehow,
you "changed your mind"
wanting to meet for a film
I agreed
because I loved you
the movie was great...
a nice horror flick on Court Street
sitting beside you felt like home
you put your legs over mine
anytime a scene frightened you
the audience screamed
so did we
then we all laughed
The night couldn't have gone any better
going to the beach afterwards
sitting in the lifeguard tower
watching the waves
the moon
you told me
you were sorry for the fighting
we kissed
As we left the shore, we noticed
a man and woman
with rollers in her hair
having sex on the hood of a car.
We laughed
The next day
You asked me
to go away with you for the weekend.
Still hurt
and confused
over those words you said to me,
I agreed
Because I loved you.
You picked me up on Saturday morning
and we had a gorgeous weekend.
You told me you loved me
and that you missed me
several times.
Once
during our mini hike and
Twice when we were kyaking
We drove back
Sunday evening and you seemed
like you didn't want me
to get out of your car.
You even called me
later that evening to see
Wolverine
but we agreed that we were both
sleepy from our weekend.
I left for Florida the following day
and you never reached out to me
I kept thinking about those awful things
you said to me initially
which broke my heart
....hurt even more that you never
wrote or called...
and I felt like....
I gave you my heart
and for some reason
you couldn't see
feel
or hear it
You didn't understand it
Or maybe you just didn't care...
we all have our demons
but I wish yours weren't so dark
so strong
And I feel silly
for missing you
and sometimes thinking about
a future with you
where we'd slowly
grow
so bright
and beautiful
together...